dream state

December 17, 2009 at 5:27 pm (Life) (, )

This morning I was jerked from my sleep by a sudden, sharp feeling of dread. Like an abrupt transition from air to frigid water, the passage from sleep to instant alertness tends to shock the mind. A host of other questions leap in and take the place of whatever dreamland horrors lurked in your subconscious. “What time is it?” “Am I late?” “Did I iron my shirt?”. Finding the answers to all of these questions satisfactory, I rolled over and waited for my alarm to to usher my consciousness once more into the real world.

Sitting at work later this morning I was suddenly reminded of the dancing terrors that stalked my sleep, but even searching my thoughts and memories I couldn’t remember what caused my distress. This was the worst part. The only thing I was completely sure of was that this nameless fear, was in fact, something completely deserving of my trepidation. This was no boogieman, no gleaming teeth menacing the bed springs in anticipation of a wayward hand drifting into its domain, no undead horrors walking the streets in an attempt to satiate an unquenchable thirst for brains (which, in my opinion, is more a cause for excitement than fear). No, this was something much more real, something deserving of my attention, something skulking in my shadows demanding my attention, stinking of anger and hatred.

So now, I sit here demanding more of my brain, while being laughed at by an unseen enemy. An enemy that seems impending and real, and forever beyond my grasp. Like the piece of celery stuck in your teeth that refuses all advances of a probing tongue, so this dream sits comfortable and safe in the hidden recesses of my mind. Until, I think, one day, when I am forced to say, danger nipping at my heels, “Oh yeah, this is what I was wondering about”.

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